"Do you hear something?" Cait Sith asked.
"It sounds like 'helphelphelphelpweregonnadieohnoooooooooo!'" Red XIII replied. "Why do you ask?"
"Never mind," Cait Sith said as a red plane streaked across the sky and crashed outside Midgar.
* * *
"'I'll figure it out,'" Jack said sarcastically. "Thanks a lot. I've probably broken every bone in my body." The ex-Fenril Knight dragged himself out from under a broken wing of the Protowing.
"Hey, it was an accident," Rufus said. "It won't happen again."
"No, it won't," Jack said. "Because I'm never letting you fly that plane again."
"I don't think anybody's going to be flying it again," Cecilia said, staring at the pile of smoking rubble.
"I want to know what we're doing right now," Jane insisted. "Who are you, for one thing?" she asked Rufus.
"Rufus Shinra," Rufus introduced himself with a bow. "President of Shinra Electric Power Company. "Welcome to Midgar City." Rufus gestured towards the city of Midgar. The group was standing outside the gate to Area 5.
Jack looked at the city. "We're not in Kansas anymore, are we, Hanpan?" he said.
Rufus reached into his coat and took out the Key to Area 5. Glancing to the side, he noticed a woodchuck watching him from a hole. "I know that's you, Reeve," he said.
"Curses," the woodchuck said. "Foiled again." The woodchuck disappeared under the ground.
Rufus opened the gate to Midgar and the group entered. Cloud, Barret, and Tifa were waiting for him. "What's going on here, Rufus?" Cloud asked. "You're dead."
"Not exactly," Rufus said.
"Are you undead or something?"
"Not exactly," Rufus replied.
"So you weren't killed by the Diamond Weapon?"
Rufus looked impatiently around. "Not exactly."
"Are you a member of Hertz #1 Club Gold?"
"Not exactly."
Seeing the discussion was going nowhere, Cloud cast Ultima. The force of the spell knocked Rufus and the rest of the party to the ground, but they promptly got back up. "How did you do that?" Barret asked.
Jack held out a small white furry figurine. "Goat dolls," he said.
"Hey," Tifa said. "Who are you people?"
"I'm Jane Maxwell," Jane said. "You might know me as 'Calamity Jane.'"
"No," Cloud said bluntly. "I don't."
"And these are my friends," Jane said. "Rudy Roughnight, Jack Van Burace, Cecilia Adlehyde, Emiko the Elw, Hanpan, and Pesmerga."
"Wha' exactly are you doing here, Rufus?" Barret asked suspiciously.
"I have to talk to the General," Rufus explained. "I need an Underwater Breath Materia. See, I'm trying to get the Ragu Ragla Summon Materia that's hidden in the secret Cetra temple on a volcanic island. I was to trying to get into the temple from the land with a lava-walking Red Chocobo, but to capture one of those, I'd need the Chocobo Control Materia, but Aerith has the only one of those and she's in the temple. Oh, and incidentally, she's not dead. So now I need an Underwater Breath Materia from the General to enter the volcano from the sea."
Cloud and Barret exchanged a quick look. "Well?" Cloud said to Barret.
"Dunno," Barret said. "It sounds like the work of Angol Fred, the King of False Rumors, to me."
"Angol Fred?" Emiko said quickly. "You know who he is?"
"I've heard of him," Barret said cautiously.
"We're chasing him," Emiko explained. "He's stolen the three gems from the Guardian Amulet. We've got one of them back, but this Aerith has another one."
Suddenly, Red XIII bounded up from behind Cloud, Barret, and Tifa. "Emiko?" he said. "Is that you?"
"Nanaki!" Emiko exclaimed. "Long time no see!"
"You two know each other?" Cloud asked.
"Yes," Red XIII replied. "You can trust them. They don't mean any harm."
"Well, all right..." Cloud said reluctantly. He moved aside to allow Rufus and the rest of the party to enter Midgar.
* * *
The General looked up as the party barged into his sick friend's tube home. "You're here for the Underwater Breath Materia, aren't you?" the General said. "Well, I don't have it."
"What?" Rufus exclaimed.
"Read my lips: NO MORE MATERIA," the General said. "Now will you kindly remove yourself from this building?"
"What happened to it?" Hanpan asked. "The Materia, I mean."
"I sold it to a guy at the Wall Market," the General said. "I'm sick of people barging in here and asking to care for my friend just so they can get the materia. You're the fourth group that came by today."
"The Wall Market," Rufus repeated. "Come on, let's hurry. We've got to get that Materia before anybody else does."
* * *
Cloud, Barret, Tifa, Red XIII, Cait Sith, Cid, Vincent, and Yuffie strolled through the Wall Market in Midgar. While Sephiroth had been defeated, there was still the matter of those two Weapons to deal with... and Cloud's party wasn't quite strong enough to defeat them yet.
"Attention all shoppers," a voice announced. "There is a blue light special on Green Materia in the northwest corner."
"If you'll excuse me for a moment..." Red XII said, bounding off to the northwest.
Rufus, Rudy, Jack, Cecilia, Emiko, Jane, and Pesmerga approached Cloud's party. "You wouldn't have seen anybody selling an Underwater Breath Materia, would you have?" Rufus asked.
"Sure we did," Cait Sith replied from atop his moogle. "In fact, I even bought it from him."
"We need that Materia, Reeve," Rufus said. "Can I borrow it?"
"What's in it for me?"
"What?" Rufus exclaimed, stepping towards Cait Sith. "Give me the Materia!"
"What's the big deal about this Underwater Breath Materia anyway?" Vincent asked.
"I need it to get into the secret Cetra temple where the Ragu Ragla Summon Materia is," Rufus said.
"You want to summon some spaghetti sauce?" Cait Sith blurted.
"Ragu Ragla is the King of Monsters, idiot," Hanpan said from Jack's shoulder.
"Hey, that's a really cool pet," Cait Sith said.
An angered look came over Hanpan's face. He flew from Jack's shoulder over to the shoulders of Cait's moogle. The wind rat ripped the megaphone from Cait Sith's hands and held it up to the cat's ear. "I'M NOT A PET!" he yelled through it.
Cait Sith reeled backwards and fell off his moogle. "Sorry," he apologized. "I just thought it was a cool to see a talking rat."
"I thought it was cool to see a talking cat." Hanpan mimicked, still on top of the golem.
"These discussions are getting us nowhere," Pesmerga said to the rest of the party. "Should we try brute force?"
"How 'bout a cat fight?" Jack suggested. He held up the Chrono Rune and used Summon Guardian. Dan Dairam dropped from the sky and landed between Cait Sith's moogle and the cat.
"There it is!" Cait Sith exclaimed. "I was wondering what happened to it."
"What the @#! are you talking about?" Cid asked.
"That was an early version of Cait Sith," Cait Sith explained, switching into Reeve's voice. "But something went wrong and it got away. It vanished, so I never worried about it."
Dan Dairam did a little dance and a glowing green ball appeared at his feet. The cat Guardian kicked it at Cait Sith. A green field of electricity engulfed Cait Sith temporarily, then vanished in a pale green cloud of smoke. Dan Dairam squeaked and disappeared back into the sky.
"What did you do to him?" Tifa asked, looking down at Cait Sith.
"He's been cursed," Emiko said clinically. "I hadn't exactly expected Dan Dairam to do that."
Cait Sith got to his feet, took a few steps towards his moogle, and fell down. "You must still be feeling a little woozy," Barret said.
"Hey, if we get this cat here uncursed for you, then will you give us that Materia thingy?" Jane asked.
"That seems fair," Cloud agreed.
"Well, all we have to do is take him to a church," Jane explained. "That's usually what you have to do in games."
"There's a church in the Area 5 slums," Barret said to Cloud. Cloud nodded.
* * *
Rudy, Jack, Cecilia, Jane, Emiko, Pesmerga, Rufus, Cloud, Barret, Tifa, Cid, Cait Sith, Vincent, Yuffie, and Red XIII entered the church. Red XIII had caught up with the party en route to Area 5 and rejoined.
As the party entered, something on the far end of the church caught Cloud's eye. It was the ghostly figure of Sephiroth, which flickered briefly, then vanished. "Was that Sephiroth?" he asked.
"It looked like him..." Vincent said cautiously.
Cid swore. "I thought we killed that $@!@#," he said.
"Now, what do we do with the cat?" Barret asked.
Wordlessly, Pesmerga pointed at a chute on the side of the building with a neon sign over it. The sign read "DISPEL CURSES HERE."
"Nah," Jane said. "That couldn't be it."
Cait Sith climbed into the chute and closed the hatch that covered it. The cat slid down a long tube. There were a spinning and clunking sound. Several minutes later, Cait Sith shot back out of the hatch. His fur was standing straight up and he was dripping water, but the green glow was gone. He staggered dizzily back to rejoin the group.
"All right, we've done our part of the bargain," Jack said. "Now where's the Materia?"
"Reeve has it," Cait Sith replied it. "It's over in the Shinra Building."
* * *
Cait Sith led the group into Reeve's office in the Shinra Building. The cat shuffled through some papers on the desk, looking for the Underwater Breath Materia. "I know it's around here somewhere," he muttered.
"Hey," Jack said. "Is that a Zip drive on your desk?"
"By the way," Vincent said, looking around. "Where's Yuffie gone to?"
"Yuffie?" Cait Sith repeated. "Oh no!" The cat hopped onto his moogle as Cid burst into a fresh string of curses. "Get moving!" Cait shouted at the moogle through his megaphone. Cait Sith charged out of the office and down the stairs, pursued by the rest of the party.
"Where are we going?" Cecilia asked.
"Yuffie's got the Underwater Breath Materia!" Cloud yelled. The party dashed out of the Shinra Building and looked around for the thief.
"I don't see her," Tifa said, looking around. "Where do you think she went?"
"She probably tried to escape into the water with the Underwater Breath Materia," Red XIII said. "Fortunately, we have a submarine."
The party walked quickly out of Midgar and jumped onto the Highwind. Cid grabbed the controls and flew to Junon, where the submarine was parked.
The Highwind flew low in the sky as it approached towards the coast of Junon. The submarine was parked just offshore... or at least it had been. The vehicle was in flames and was sinking rapidly.
Cid swore again. "There goes the @#!in' submarine," he said.
Two figures were standing on the beach near the submarine. From a distance, they looked remarkably similar to Cloud and Barret. Cid flew the Highwind in for a closer look.
One of the people was a younger version of Cloud. The other one looked identical to Barret... except for its glowing red eyes. It was Garret, his evil twin. Standing in front of them was Bakusa the imp. The trio was watching the submarine sink with satisfaction.
P-Cloud looked up as the Highwind approached them. "We'd better hit the road," he said.
"Who are you?" Cait Sith shouted down with his megaphone.
"The General sent me," Bakusa said. "General Aerith, that is." The imp then cast Escape and the three vanished.
Rudy looked down at the sinking submarine. "Now what are we going to do?" he wondered.
| Next chapter: Yuffie Must Die! |