Nintendo/Bandai

March 1989

Exercise

1 Players

Why sweat to the oldies when you can take off the pounds with a true classic, the Nintendo Entertainment System?  Dance Aerobics invites you to break out the Power Pad and begin a light workout with its star, a perky young girl in leg warmers and a pink leotard.  She won't make it too easy for you, so follow her movements closely or you'll be forced to start over!

Tradewest/Rare

August 1992

Racing

1-4 Players

The sequel to Super Off-Road takes the racing action off the rough gravel roads and drops it onto a paved race track.  This, coupled with the more plentiful nitrous boosts, speeds up the gameplay considerably.  At the same time, the flat courses lack Super Off-Road's character, and a few have so many intersections and overpasses that you can't help but be confused by them.

Ocean

October 1991

Action

1 Player

You'll think the disfigured star of the film Darkman had it off easy after you play his ridiculously unfair video game.  Having your face melted off isn't much fun, but constantly slipping off platforms and being thrown into pits by enemies you can never seem to hit is a far worse fate.  Sure, the graphics aren't bad, but when the gameplay sucks this much, who cares?

FAST FACT:  Darkman was Evil Dead director Sam Raimi's first big-budget action film.  It was also the first of Raimi's films to be adapted into a video game, but it would not be the last.  After creating the Hercules and Xena television series, Raimi returned to films, directing Spiderman and its sequel for Columbia Pictures.  Both movies were huge successes, inspiring video games for a wide variety of systems.

Capcom

June 1992

Action

1 Player

It's no surprise that Darkwing Duck borrows heavily from Capcom's own Mega Man series, using the same brightly colored artwork and the same style of running, gunning gameplay.  What WILL shock you is that this adaptation of the Disney cartoon is actually tougher than the already challenging Mega Man games, with a less generous life meter and harder to dodge enemies.

Data East/Beam

February 1990

Action/Puzzle

1 Player

You're Dash Galaxy, and you're being held captive in a heavily guarded prison.  Your only way out is by pushing blocks to uncover hidden rooms, then entering these rooms to collect everything that isn't nailed down (or trying to kill you).  You won't be in a dash to play this mediocre action title, but it is playable if you can look past the shabby graphics and sound.

Hal/Sculptured

June 1992

Action

1 Player

When life's got little Davey down, he escapes into a fantasy world that somehow manages to be even more depressing than the one he left behind.  You'll wander through labyrinths, slaying badly drawn foes that pop out of nowhere and collecting largely uninteresting items.  The kid's got a lousy imagination... maybe he needs to stop watching so much television or something.

Mindscape/Beam

October 1990

Racing

1 Player

Beam deserves congratulations for pulling off some of the most impressive 3D effects ever on the NES.  The smoothly animated race track is nothing short of stunning, putting other racing games on the system to shame.  The repetitive gameplay is less enticing, but Days of Thunder is worth checking out if only to experience its astonishing visuals.

Broderbund/Irem

September 1987

Action/Adventure

1 Player

Prince Meyer is a truly manly warrior... so much so, in fact, that he can fire knives from his crotch!  He'll need this power to save his badly drawn kingdom from the forces of badly drawn evil.  Better not get too close to the angry pillbugs and cavemen, though!  They have a nasty habit of instantly draining your life bar in this sad, sad excuse for an action RPG.