Qu's Marsh - Cait Sith's Mailbag Archives
Return | Read | Look | Listen | Play

Cait Sith's Mailbag - September 5th, 1998

Cait Sith has returned from his battle with Humphreys and Cid to take on spies, the Anti-Glick, my Gaelic background, advice columns, and sidekicks.

Q: Just a few questions for you:
(1) Were you aware that your name is Gaelic, and that it comes from the words meaning 'cat' and 'spirit'?
(2) Did you know it's properly pronounced 'kat she', sounding a lot like the word 'catchy'?
(3) Did you know the word 'banshee' is of similar construction, and that 'bean sidhe' means "woman spirit"?
(4) How do you feel about rhetorical questions?

PS (5) Is the Luna you're interested in any relation to the one on Sailor Moon? If so, can't you just foist her off on Artemis?

Cait sez:
1. Of course I'm aware of them. I'm quite proud of my Gaelic background. In fact, I... well, I don't know what I do.
2. Haven't already said that like 8 time in this mailbag. It's a "cathcy" name, get it? Hee hee hee. Just remember, there's no "T" in that second word.
3. Hey, is that bean over there moving? Oh no! It's a Bean Sidhe! Run for your lives!
4. Aren't rhetorical questions really stupid? I mean, what kind of idiot would ask rhetorical questions?
5. FOIST HER OFF ON ARTEMIS??? Grrr... now I'm angry... if I wasn't still on crutches and come over there and give you a swift kick in the pants.

Cait sez: Maybe I should start an advice column. "Dear Cait, my boyfriend spends his nights with a hermaphrodite human with a cat fetish. What should I do?" "Answer: Give me a call!" Hee hee hee....

Um, in answer to your question, Felicia is a bit tall for me... same with Katt. And why did you bother numbering the question when there was only one? Sending that requires more computer power, which means more electricity, which means more fossil fuels have to be burned! You're destroying the environment! YOU MURDERER YOU!

Dear MM, I know that you are a superhero, but have you ever considered getting a sidekick, someone who can help you in your crimefighting? (And knows about your A.E.)

For some hints on sidekicks, here is a starting list

1. Bottles the Mole

2. Red XIII

3. Max

4. Tails

You can figure out the rest, think about it.

Spencer(Cait's P.S.)

Stone Cold Hanpan sez: Yeah, I do need a sidekick. Even the Cids have a sidekick now (Peco). And why do I need a sidekick? BECAUSE HANPAN SAID SO! Max's pretty cool, maybe I'll talk to him.

Max sez: Shall I confront, subdue, and pummel the suspected perpetrator, Hanpan?
Hanpan sez: Sic 'em up, little buddy.
Max sez: I'm bigger than you are, Hanpan.
Hanpan sez: Oh yeah. Well, just get Domino pronto, okay?
Max sez: Hanpan, is "pronto" a real word?

1. Who would win in a boxing match? You or Diddy Kong?

2. i antidisestablishmentarianismist ine dishgust of how people try imatate me why du yoo supose they do that.

3. Isnt he a retard?

4. Cait Sith is a cat only smart people no tat.

5. Are tifas uh... y'know real?

6. When yoo war a spi did yoo meat James Bond?

7. Hey Cait would you like me to shoot this guy or what?

8. Wat game was you ine?

9. Where in all the seven hells did square get the idea for a lame ass game Like "Brave Fencer Mushashi?"

10. are i not very superduper interigent i know how to say transcoontanintel.

Okay thats all. Alright "Crono" youve served your purpose. Bye now "wait noo i am smart i am soo smoort i no yoo will..." (BANG)

The Infamous Westward Stabber and the Late "Smart Chrono"(WARKWARK)

Cait sez:
1. I could take down Diddy Kong, easy. I'd team up with Hanpan and fight him and the annoying Kiddy Kong. Hanpan would use his Stone Cold Stunner while I used Cat Rain to confuse them.
2. Stone Cold sez: You spelled "Antidisestablishmentarianism" wrong, simpleton!
3. Cait sez: Who, Hanpan or Smart Crono? Actually, the both are.
4. smart people are people tat are smart
5. Yes, that is a genuine gold ring she has. Or, uh, is that what you meant?
6. I wasn't a spy! Saddam Hussein just thought I was. Actually, it would pretty cool to be a spy. "Sith. Cait Sith. Agent Double-F 7. Starring in... The Cat Who Loved Me, costarring Luna."
7. No, violence is not the answer.
8. Stone Cold sez: He was in FF7, simpleton.
9. Cait sez: I don't know. They were supposed to give me a cameo appearence in it, but noooooooo....
10. You may know how to say it, but you can't spell it.

Q: Zwa ha ha
Greetings Mr Blick (If that IS your real name)
I see that Mr Sith has foiled my evil scheme to bombard you with useless AOL disks.....
But I am not defeated, for now I have a Hotmail account! Now I shall defeat you using a combination of Cosmo Canyon Mailbag letters and secret Nazi movements. I will not rest until my task is completed...... I dont have a task yet.... But I shall reveal what it is as soon as I think of one!

The Anti-Glick
antiglick@hotmail.com

ps. My flatmate it NOT Glick's evil nemesis! I'm the evil one! Maybe Neil likes Aqua, but he isnt as truly evil as me.

Cait sez: The saga continues... Brian Glick and RPGamer versus the Anti-Glick and the Nazis. Hey, maybe you guys should meet in the parking lot of the Shinra Building at midnight and settle your differences there. And to make it even more exciting, you could fight with garden rakes! Spencer, send out a press release announcing the battle immediately.

Fritz sez: Speaking of Nazis, one of the janitors at our school looks a lot like Hitler, right down to the mustache. I'm not even kidding.

Ben McKee sez: Zucchinis are ripe.

(Back to the Cait Sith's Mailbag archive page.)